HOW FUCKING CHILL IT IS

How fucking chill it is to be a dentist.
How fucking chill it is to not have had to get into med school.
How fucking chill it is to study gums.

Dentistry is an art form only practiced by the chill.
A dentist can have his own office and give his employees drug tests and look over the results while he is holding in a bong hit.

How fucking chill it is to have such a love for dentistry.
How fucking chill it is to have such love for chillness.
How fucking chill it is to put that uncomfortable cardboard thing in a patient's mouth while you are taking x-rays of their teeth and while you are being so chill and taking you time, they are gagging.

WALK HUMUNGOUS RELAPSE

if you are still out in the cold about WALK HUMUNGOUS then go to their website: www.walkhumungous.com

lisabot saw Ridiculous Weird and Jesus Crisis out and about last night. they were both disguised as nromal dudes, which in their case lisabot thinks is a good idea to prevent fanatic mayhem. if you see them out, salute them- they are those who are about to rock.

YO SON, MICHAEL CUNNIGHAM WAS HOT YO

michael cunningham was exquisite at his reading in an NYU law school building on thusday. john jay students held up strong support for the novelist with excited praise.
though as a side note, more parise to the students than to Michael, growing is difficult and akward sometimes but we make it don't we...
his new novel sounds wonderful. if anyone else told lisabot that they were writing a book that is a ghost story, a mystery and a science fiction, lisabot would make the perverbial "disgust" face. but he read out of it and it was great.

DOUG'S APOCOLSPE
Mr. Jon Hill- you might be the only other writer that exists that could do a book like that. so on that note lisabot would like to say for the record: I AM FINE WITH YOU ENDING THE WORLD AND KILLING MY CHARACTER. so have at it.

EVERYONE LOVES A GUY ON CRUTCHES

"YOU ARE LOOKING VERY ENGLISH TODAY"

a moment of silence for the foot which had to be placed in a cast again.






okay so the good thing about it is: is you are a man and on crutches, just act really incapable of helping yourself. women love that shit and it is a fact. they will care for you. and if you are very sly, lucky and skillful, they just might ease your pain. picking up chicks on crutches is so easy in fact, sources at LisaBot point to the incident involving a staff (male) staff member who used crutches for three months just to pick up chicks. it worked too. and we are considering firing him for the ridiculousness of the incident (yes, that is totally unrelated to the workplace and none of our business here in the office but we never claimed to be honest and fair around here).
futhermore on crutches: and i quote a certain poet from Toledo: "THESE ARE KIND OF FUN."

a bottle of wine and a stray forty dollars

WRITERS
workshops merged monday night for one extravagant and productive night of drinking. 2 poets + 5 fiction writers = $307 bar tab. the facts are that simple folks. other theories considered monday night as follows: doing a shitlaod of heroin does not make you an alcholic, you will not be taken to jail for yelling on the sidewalk of 6th ave., if you have a friend who owns a bar and you also have a lost debit card you may be able to manage to aquire $40 from the bar register to spend at the bar.
other news... after 6 bottles of wine and about 8 beers a groups of seven can forget where they are, directions to the next bar and that they have a girlfriend in South Africa. poetry is useless but harder to write than prose.

CONGRATS TO THE FOOT: THE LONG AWAITED APPEARANCE
the foot will be making its first appearance since the notorious CWP 04 started in September. foot, welcome back to the world. we are happy to have you.

ELECTION
the election will not be addressed in this blog. for those of you outside the blubbery bubble of New York, we are all in one piece however some are trying to convince themselves otherwise.

ZACH BRAFF
after the fiascos in dating, LisaBot's field reporter who will remain unmentioned, reserves a permanent opening fridat night ("date night") for Zach Braff. however this reservation will be revoked if the soudtrack of Garden State was chosen by someone else. our research staff is on a smoke break and those kinds of statistics are unavailable to us at this time. please put the word out.

ONE FOR THE ROAD
to the most passionate lover of poetry: after great deliberation here in the enormous and complicated offices of LisaBot, the verdict is that you are right. poetry. poetry changes the world as much as anything else and we agree that if a person can not understand that, that is indeed their own problem.